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  • gretchenrubin 12:00:28 on 2018/11/08 Permalink
    Tags: , book list, , , , , ,   

    Want to Give the Gift of a Book This Holiday Season? A Gift Guide for All Kinds of Readers. 

    It's holiday time! And that means it's time to choose gifts for the people in our lives. Which can be fun, but can also be frustrating and difficult.

    One of the best gifts to give is a book. How I love books. Plus they're easy to wrap, easy to transport, and easy to re-gift if necessary.

    But that leads to the question...what book?

    Here are some suggestions for different categories of gift-recipients, with suggestions of books that I love.

    If I'd made this list last week, or if I did it next week, I'm sure I'd come up with an entirely different list. I love so many books, it's hard to pick out a few. But this is a start.

    For a new parent: Operating Instructions, Anne Lamott

    For the parent of small children: How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk, Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

    For a person interested in spirituality: Death Comes for the Archbishop, Willa Cather

    For a person who loves celebrity memoirs: Born Standing Up, Steve Martin

    For someone who loves to cook: Home Cooking, Laurie Colwin

    For a fisherman: A River Runs Through It, Norman McLean

    For a history lover: Their Finest Hour, Winston Churchill

    For someone who loves a great study of character: The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie, Muriel Spark

    For a nature-lover: Into the Wild, John Krakauer

    For a person who's interested in sports and leadership: The Captain Class, Sam Walker

    For someone who loves fantasy: American Gods, Neil Gaiman

    For someone who loves to write: A Writer's Diary, Virginia Woolf

    For someone who loves science fiction: Lord of Light, Robert Zelazny

    Book that changed my life: Why We Get Fat, Gary Taubes (Want to read my interview with Gary Taubes? Request it here.)

    Book that was made into a movie, and both are brilliant: Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk

    Book that I played hooky from work to stay home to read: The Stand, Stephen King (I recommend the standard, not the unabridged, version)

    Book that people keep telling me to read: Bad Blood, John Carreyrou

    For someone who's starting to date or looking for a job: First Impressions, Ann Demarais and Valerie White

    For someone with a short attention span or who loves very short stories: Revenge of the Lawn, Richard Brautigan

    For someone who loves essays: Selected EssaysGeorge Orwell

    For a person interested in human nature: The Varieties of Religious Experience, William James

    For a person interested in film: In the Blink of an Eye, Walter Murch

    For a person interested in friendship: Truth and Beauty, Ann Patchett

    For a person interested in journalism: The Journalist and the Murderer, Janet Malcolm

    For a person who loves a twist at the end: The End of the Affair, Graham Greene

     

    If you're buying a book for a child or young-adult, check out my list of 81 Favorite Works of Children's and Young-Adult Literature. So many good books!

    Of course, I can't resist recommending my own books.

    If you're giving one of my books as a gift, and want to put in a free, personalized bookplate to make it more special, sign up here to request one. Feel free to request as many as you want (within reason). Alas, because of mailing costs, I can offer this to people in the U.S. and Canada only. Sorry about that!

    If you'd like to see what I've read, follow me on Goodreads. Or look on Facebook, where every Sunday night, on #GretchenRubinReads, I post a photo of the books I've read that week.

    As I write about in my book Better Than Before, I've changed my reading habits so that now, if I don't like a book, I stop reading it. So if you see a book listed in Goodreads or on Facebook, you know that I liked a book well enough to finish it.

    I love to choose, give, and receive books!

     
  • feedwordpress 10:00:17 on 2018/11/04 Permalink
    Tags: , , book list, , October,   

    What I Read This Month: October 2018 

    For more than two years now, every Monday morning, I've posted a photo on my Facebook Page of the books I finished during the week, with the tag #GretchenRubinReads

    I get a big kick out of this weekly habit—it’s a way to shine a spotlight on all the terrific books that I’ve read.

    As I write about in my book Better Than Before, for most of my life, my habit was to finish any book that I started. Finally, I realized that this approach meant that I spent time reading books that bored me, and I had less time for books that I truly enjoy. These days, I now put down a book if I don’t feel like finishing it, so I have more time to do my favorite kinds of reading.

    This habit means that if you see a book included in the #GretchenRubinReads photo, you know that I liked it well enough to read to the last page.

    If you’d like more ideas for habits to help you get more reading done, read this post or download my "Reading Better Than Before" worksheet.

    You can also follow me on Goodreads where I've recently started tracking books I’ve read.

    If you want to see what I read in September 2018, the full list is here.

    October 2018 Reading

    The Home-Maker by Dorothy Canfield Fisher -- One of my very favorite works of children's literature is the masterpiece Understood Betsy by Dorothy Canfield Fisher. It's on my list of my 81 Favorite Works of Children's and Young-Adult Literature. How I love that book! Through reading about Pearl Buck, I learned that Dorothy Canfield Fisher wrote for adults, so off I trotted to the library. I very much enjoyed this book—a real period piece.

    Fables for Parents by Dorothy Canfield Fisher -- These are short stories. I enjoyed them all, and two are unforgettable: "The Forgotten Mother" and "A Family Alliance."

    Harvest of Stories by Dorothy Canfield Fisher -- More short stories.

    Lives Other Than My Own by Emmanuel Carrère -- A bookish friend recommended this to me, and I headed to the library to get it. I found it so interesting that I then read...

    My Life as a Russian Novel by Emmanuel Carrère -- Also very interesting. So then...

    The Adversary: A True Story of Monstrous Deception by Emmanuel Carrère -- Interesting, very dark, like his other books, didn't unfold as I expected.

    The Loneliest Girl in the Universe by Lauren James -- My daughter Eleanor and I both raced through this book. Great suspense, more than one great twist.

    Fighting Angel by Pearl S. Buck -- My Pearl Buck obsession has run its course, I believe. This is the last book I feel compelled to read. Wait, never mind—I still want to re-read The Good Earth. This book is a memoir/biography about Buck's missionary father. If you're curious, I did an episode of "A Little Happier" where I discuss an anecdote that Buck tells about him elsewhere: "A Puzzling Story from the Life of Pearl S. Buck."

    The Four-Story Mistake by Elizabeth Enright -- So, so, so, so, SO good. On the list of 81, of course.

    Then There Were Five by Elizabeth Enright -- I've read it fifty times, if not more.

    Spiderweb for Two by Elizabeth Enright -- If you know me, you're thinking, "Hmmm, Gretchen is re-reading for the millionth time her favorite works of children's literature, and she's focusing on Elizabeth Enright. Does that mean she's feeling stressed out about something?" Answer: yes. That's my tell. But I'm feeling much calmer now.

    Lethal White by Robert Galbraith -- I will read anything that J. K. Rowling writes, under any pseudonym she chooses. In hardback!

    Nonrequired Reading by Wislawa Szymborska -- Little essays. Thought-provoking.

    Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant by Anne Tyler -- I read this years ago, and it was nothing like I remembered, which surprised me. A good, absorbing read.

    The World I Live In by Helen Keller -- Fascinating. What a life, what a mind.

    Nothing Good Can Come from This by Kristi Coulter -- I heard about this book on the terrific podcast But That's Another Story. A great book about quitting drinking, and much more. Bizarre coincidence: in the interview, Kristi Coulter mentioned that she loves Elizabeth Enright (see above)! And also Laurie Colwin, whom I also love.

    Aroma: The Cultural History of Smell by Constance Classen, David Howes, and Anthony Synnott -- Research for my next book. Can't learn enough about smell.

    Butcher's Crossing by John Williams -- I'm astonished I've never read this book before, or even heard of it. A really great book. Symbols and metaphors shooting off in all directions. (Though, if you've read it, do you agree with me that the ending was a bit off?)

    Jayber Crow by Wendell Berry -- Love, love, love this novel. Beautiful, haunting.

    Hannah Coulter by Wendell Berry -- Love this one too, but if you're thinking, "Of the two, which Berry novel did she like better?" I'd say Jayber Crow.

    The Outcasts: Brotherband Chronicles, Book 1 by John Flanagan -- I love this world, I keep reading more and more of these novels. This was a gift from a friend, such a treat.

    So You Want to Be a Wizard by Diane Duane -- Fun! A girl finds a magical book in the library, say no more.

    The Making of a Manager by Julie Zhuo -- In galley. Great insights into the challenges of being a manager. Zhuo is a manager at Facebook.

    What No One Ever Tells You by Dr. Alexandra Sacks and Dr. Catherine Birndorf -- In galley. Great insights into the challenges of being a new mother.

    If You're In My Office, It's Already Too Late by James J. Sexton -- Do's and don'ts from a divorce lawyer. I read about this book in the newspaper, and I just had to get a copy. In a nutshell: be nice to your sweetheart.

    Quantum Change by William R. Miller and Janet C'de Baca -- I've read this book before. It is absolutely fascinating. It's like nothing I've ever read before. I suppose it reminds me of The Varieties of Religious Experience.

    What are you reading this month?

     
  • feedwordpress 15:20:07 on 2018/09/28 Permalink
    Tags: , , book list, , ,   

    What I Read This Month: September 2018 

    For more than two years now, every Monday morning, I've posted a photo on my Facebook Page of the books I finished during the week, with the tag #GretchenRubinReads

    I get a big kick out of this weekly habit—it’s a way to shine a spotlight on all the terrific books that I’ve completed.

    As I write about in my book Better Than Before, for most of my life, my habit was to finish any book that I started. Finally, I realized that this approach meant that I spent time reading books that bored me, and I had less time for books that I truly enjoy. These days, I now put down a book if I don’t feel like finishing it, so I have more time to do my favorite kinds of reading.

    This habit means that if you see a book included in the #GretchenRubinReads photo, you know that I liked it well enough to read to the last page.

    If you’d like more ideas for habits to help you get more reading done, read this post or download my "Reading Better Than Before" worksheet.

    You can also follow me on Goodreads where I've recently started tracking books I’ve read.

    If you want to see what I read in August 2018, the full list is here.

    September 2018 Reading

    Turn: The Journal of an Artist by Anne Truitt - artist Anne Truitt wrote three brilliant memoirs; this is the third. I highly recommend all three.

    A Little Love Song by Michelle Magorian - by the author of Goodnight, Mr. Tom, a book I discovered recently. I really enjoyed this novel.

    Red, White, Blue by Lea Carpenter - Lea is a friend, so I couldn't wait to read her novel—and it's excellent.

    In This House of Brede by Rumer Godden - this is my second time reading this book, which I love. I love books about a spiritual consciousness.

    A Spool of Blue Thread by Anne Tyler - a great story, told beautifully, very thought-provoking. I sense an Anne Tyler phase coming on.

    True Enough by Stephen McCauley - I just discovered McCauley's work. I really enjoyed this novel.

    Property by Lionel Shriver - I love the work of Lionel Shriver. LOVE. I don't usually read short stores, but loved this book, especially the first and last stories.

    The Emigrants by W. G. Sebald - an unusual, fascinating way to approach a novel. I wish I could take a class in which we discussed it.

    Inheritance by Dani Shapiro - couldn't put this memoir down, read it in one or two days. And so timely! The widespread availability of DNA information has personally affected so many people I know.

    Stories of my Life by Katherine Paterson - how I love the work of Katherine Paterson. Odd fact: she and Pearl S. Buck were both the children of missionaries in China.

    Gone-Away Lake by Elizabeth Enright - I've read this book about fifty times. I never tire of it. So good.

    Behind the Scenes at the Museum by Kate Atkinson - this novel has been on my library list for years, really enjoyed it.

    Pearl S. Buck: A Cultural Biography by Peter Conn - Pearl Buck phase continues. What a life!

    Return to Gone-Away by Elizabeth Enright - see above. So, so, so, so, so good.

    Weetzie Bat by Francesca Block - this short YA novel isn't quite like anything I've ever read before. Very interesting.

    The Child Who Never Grew by Pearl S. Buck - more Pearl Buck. This short book, originally published in Ladies' Home Journal if I remember correctly, was ground-breaking. At the time, few parents publicly discussed their children with special needs. Buck was a tireless advocate for this community.

    Who is Rich? by Matthew Klam - I really enjoyed this novel, especially because it was a brilliant portrait of the Four Tendencies. The main character is an Obliger who goes into classic, full Obliger-rebellion. (I wrote more about Rich's Obliger-rebellion in this post.)

    The Fixer: My Adventures Saving Startups from Death by Politics by Bradley Tusk - Bradley is a friend, and it's always especially interesting to read a memoir by someone I know. This is a great one. You can listen to his interview on the Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast here.

    The Italian Teacher by Tom Rachman - my husband had checked this novel out of the library and highly recommended it, so it was delivered into my hands. Very enjoyable. I've been meaning to read Rachman for a while.

    What are you reading this month?

     
  • Crystal Ellefsen 10:00:22 on 2018/09/15 Permalink
    Tags: , book list, book recommendations,   

    15 Books That Not Everyone Will Love 

    Here is a round-up of some of my favorite eccentric picks.

    Now, looking at this list, you might ask, "Well, just how eccentric is a book like American Gods? It's a gigantically popular, best-selling book." By "eccentric," I mean that these books aren't for everyone. They suit my idiosyncratic tastes. Not everyone likes books that are fantasy-set-in-the-real-world. But I love it!

    People often ask me to describe the books I recommend. I don't like to do that, because weirdly I often find that when someone describes a book to me, I want to read it less. The best books often sound terrible. So I like to say, "Take it from me, this is a great book."

     

    1. American Gods by Neil Gaiman

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    2. Revenge of the Lawn by Richard Brautigan

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    3. Orlando: A Biography by Virginia Woolf

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    4. A Pattern Language: Towns, Buildings, Construction by Christopher Alexander

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    5. Understanding Comics: The Invisible Art by Scott McCloud

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    6. J. M. Barrie and the Lost Boys: the Real Story Behind Peter Pan by Andrew Birkin

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    7. Crowds and Power by Elias Canetti

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    8. Truth and Beauty: A Friendship by Ann Patchett

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    9. The Golden Bough: a Study in Magic and Religion by James Frazer

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    10. Memoirs of Hadrian by Marguerite Yourcenar

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    11. The Screwtape Letters by C. S. Lewis

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    12. Flaubert’s Parrot by Julian Barnes

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    13. The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas by Gertrude Stein

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    14. Forty-one False Starts: Essays on Artists and Writers by Janet Malcolm

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    15. The Official Preppy Handbook edited by Lisa Birnbach

    Buy from Barnes & Noble; Amazon

     
  • feedwordpress 11:00:37 on 2018/08/31 Permalink
    Tags: , , book list, ,   

    What I Read This Month: August 2018. 

    For more than two years now, every Monday morning, I've posted a photo on my Facebook Page of the books I finished during the week, with the tag #GretchenRubinReads

    I get a big kick out of this weekly habit—it’s a way to shine a spotlight on all the terrific books that I’ve completed. It gives me the same satisfaction that I felt in grade school when we kept track of all the books we’d read on an “I’m a BookWorm” sheet.

    As I write about in my book Better Than Before, for most of my life, my habit was to finish any book that I started. Finally, I realized that this approach meant that I spent time reading books that bored me, and I had less time for books that I truly enjoy. These days, I now put down a book if I don’t feel like finishing it, so I have more time to do my favorite kinds of reading.

    This habit means that if you see a book included in the #GretchenRubinReads photo, you know that I liked it well enough to read to the last page.

    If you’d like more ideas for habits to help you get more reading done, you can read my post here.

    As an enthusiastic reader, I’m always trying to get ideas for new great books to try. For instance, I read the delightful British quarterly Slightly Foxed. Readers with the same challenge have asked me to create a list of the books I post, so that they can more easily read the titles and get ideas for books they may want to read.

    So, I'm trying this out. Let me know what you think. You can also follow me on Goodreads where I've recently started tracking books I’ve read—however, I must confess, I’m a bit scattershot about leaving specific comments there. You’ll also see that I have very eclectic tastes!

    If you want to see what I read in July 2018, the full list is here.

    August 2018 Reading

    My Several Worlds - Pearl S. Buck -- I'm on a bit of a Pearl S. Buck kick (see below)

    Sempre Susan - Sigrid Nunez -- I want to read more about Susan Sontag. From reading this memoir, I'm confident that she's a Rebel.

    Lord of Light - Robert Zelazny -- how had I never read this book before? Just my kind of thing.

    Letter from Peking - Pearl S. Buck -- more Buck!

    Spinning Silver - Naomi Novik -- Raced through this book. And if you haven't read Novik's novel His Majesty's Dragon, run don't walk; it's one of my very favorites. Speaking of the Four Tendencies, in His Majesty's Dragon the main character Captain Will Laurence is an Upholder, and the dragon Temeraire is a Questioner.

    Ranger's Apprentice: The Icebound Land - John Flanagan -- working my way through the whole "Ranger's Apprentice" series. A friend just gave me a Brotherband book as well.

    Anybody Can Do Anything - Betty MacDonald -- yes, this is the Betty MacDonald who wrote the brilliant Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle books! Her adult memoirs are terrific, too; she's best known for The Egg and I. This is a fascinating, funny account of what it was like for her, as a woman, to look for work during the Depression.

    The River - Rumer Godden -- how I love Rumer Godden. This was shelved in my library in Adult Fiction, but now that I've read it, I think it's more YA.

    Hourglass - Dani Shapiro -- this was actually a re-read; I read the memoir when it was first published. So thought-provoking. (Yes, I include re-reads in my weekly lists.)

    My Ex-Life - Stephen McCauley -- can't wait to read more by McCauley. I loved this novel.

    How it All Began - Penelope Lively -- a very compelling novel. It was perfect for an airplane ride, and that's one of the highest compliments I can pay a book.

    What are you reading this month?

     
  • feedwordpress 09:00:45 on 2018/07/30 Permalink
    Tags: , , book list, ,   

    What I read this month: July 2018 

    For more than two years now, every Monday morning, I've posted a photo on my Facebook Page of the books I finished during the week, with the tag #GretchenRubinReads

    I get a big kick out of this weekly habit – it’s a way to shine a spotlight on all the terrific books that I’ve completed. It gives me the same satisfaction that I felt in grade school when we kept track of all the books we’d read on an “I’m a BookWorm” sheet.

    As I write about in my book Better Than Before, for most of my life, my habit was to finish any book that I started. Finally, I realized that this approach meant that I spent time reading books that bored me, and I had less time for books that I truly enjoy. These days, I now put down a book if I don’t feel like finishing it, so I have more time to do my favorite kinds of reading.

    This habit means that if you see a book included in the #GretchenRubinReads photo, you know that I liked it well enough to read to the last page.

    If you’d like more ideas for habits to help you get more reading done, you can read my post here.

    As an enthusiastic reader, I’m always trying to get ideas for new great books to try. For instance, I read the delightful British quarterly Slightly Foxed. Readers with the same challenge have asked me to create a list of the books I post, so that they can more easily read the titles and get ideas for books they may want to read.

    So, I'm trying this out. Let me know what you think. You can also follow me on Goodreads where I've recently started tracking books I’ve read – however, I must confess, I’m a bit scattershot about leaving specific comments there. You’ll also see that I have very eclectic tastes!

     

    July 2018 Reading

    Ancillary Justice - Ann Leckie

    Hot Milk - Deborah Levy

    Johnson on Savage: The Life of Mr. Richard Savage - Richard Holmes and Samuel Johnson

    Line Color Form: The Language of Art and Design - Jesse Day

    The Heart's Invisible Furies - John Boyne

    Angle of Repose - Wallace Stegner

    Shadows on the Rock - Willa Cather

    Less - Andrew Sean Greer

    The Violet Hour: Great Writers at the End - Katie Roiphe

    The Practicing Stoic: A Philosophical User's Manual - Ward Farnsworth

    Second Nature: A Gardener's Education - Michael Pollan

    Accidental Icon: Musings of a Geriatric Starlet - Iris Apfel

    Peacock and Vine: On William Morris and Mariano FortunyA.S. Byatt

    Willa Cather on Writing: Critical Studies on Writing as an Art - Willa Cather

    Maxims - La Rochefoucauld

    Tuesdays at the Castle - Jessica Day George

    My Summer in a Garden - Charles Dudley Warner

    Searching for Caleb - Anne Tyler

    A Bridge for Passing: A Meditation on Love, Loss, and Faith - Pearl S. Buck

    What the Nose Knows - Avery Gilbert

    Flower Confidential: The Good, the Bad, and the Beautiful - Amy Stewart

    From the Ground Up - Amy Stewart

    The Solitary Summer - Elizabeth Von Arnim

    Mr. Skeffington - Elizabeth Von Armin

    Ranger's Apprentice: The Ruins of Gorlan - John Flanagan

    Back Home - Michelle Magorian

     

    What are you reading this month?

     
  • Crystal Ellefsen 12:00:30 on 2018/07/10 Permalink
    Tags: book list, , , , young adult books   

    A Selection of 9 Young-Adult Novels That I Read Over and Over 

    I love to read. And I love to read children's and young-adult novels. In fact, I'm in three (yes, three) book groups where we read only "kidlit."

    And I love to re-read. I'm sure I've read some of my favorite books at least twenty times.

    In case you're interested in reading some YA novels, here is a list of some of my favorites. I've read all of them at least twice, and some of them many more times than that.

    Now, I must add, this is a very haphazard list of my favorites. There are so many books that I've read and re-read. I wanted this list to include some very well-known books, and also some that are less well-known, for people who are looking for something they may not have known about.

    1. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

    Buy from IndieBound; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    2. What I Saw and How I Lied by Judy Blundell

    Buy from IndieBoundBarnes & Noble; Amazon

    3. Fire and Hemlock by Diana Wynne Jones

    Buy from WORDBarnes & Noble; Amazon

    4.  Jane-Emily by Patricia Clapp

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    5. Someday This Pain Will Be Useful to You by Peter Cameron

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    6. Graceling by Kristin Cashore

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon.

    7. The Greengage Summer by Rumer Godden

    Buy from Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    8. Up a Road Slowly by Irene Hunt

    (Wow, I really dislike the new cover; ignore that.)

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    9. The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman

    Buy from WORD; Barnes & Noble; Amazon

    What's the difference, you may ask, among a work of children's literature, a work of adult literature, and a work of young-adult literature? In my three children's literature reading groups, this question often comes up. And there's no clear answer.

    And the sorting of books changes over time. Catcher in the Rye and Jane Eyre are now often shelved with young-adult literature, though they started out as novels for adults.

    What books have you read over and over?

     
  • feedwordpress 12:00:14 on 2018/04/24 Permalink
    Tags: , book list, book recomendations, , , , favorite books,   

    My Favorite Books About Parenting. 

    Mother’s Day is coming up, so in honor of the holiday I decided to make a list of my favorite parenting books. I’ve read many parenting books, but there are a few that really stand out to me – in many cases, I’ve read these books several times.

    One thing I've discovered is that when a parenting book is truly excellent, its advice is just as helpful for dealing with adults as with children. Children and adults are more alike than we sometimes assume. For instance, when I was researching habits for Better Than Before, my book about habit change, I did a fair amount of research on the design of pre-school and kindergarten routines.

    So after reading these books about parenthood, I’ve applied most of what I learned to my adult relationships, with equal success:

    1. How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.

    How I love this book! It has helped me tremendously as a parent – and in every other aspect of my life. In fact, I probably think more about its lessons in the context of adult interactions that I do of child interactions. I've read it at least five times. It’s very wise, and it’s also a very fun read.

    One of the most important lessons I learned from this book? Make people feel happier by acknowledging that they’re not feeling happy. When we acknowledge the reality of other people’s feelings, they know they’re being heard. Instead of denying feelings like anger, irritation, fear, or reluctance, we do better to articulate the other person’s point of view. It turns out that when people’s bad feelings are acknowledged, those feelings dissipate more easily.

    This was a giant revelation to me. It really, really works. If you’d like to read a post I wrote on this subject, it’s here.

    2. I also love Faber & Mazlish’s book Siblings Without Rivalry.

    3. Practical Wisdom for Parents: Raising Self-Confident Children in the Preschool Years by Nancy Schulman and Ellen Birnbaum.

    I love this book, in part because it’s a terrific book and in part because it was written by two people whom I really like and respect. In fact, as I describe in my book The Happiness Project, I played a small role in the book’s inception. (You can also read that story here.)

    If you want to listen to a two-minute episode of "A Little Happier" where I describe one of the many wise things that Nancy Schulman said to me, it’s here.

    4. Best Friends, Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Lives of Children by Michael Thompson.

    I’m a giant raving fan of Michael Thompson’s work. It’s practical, realistic, and insightful, plus it’s written in a very engaging way.

    Here’s a post I wrote about a passage from the book about why it’s a bad idea to "interview for pain." Again, this principle is just as true for adults as for kids.

    5. I also love Thompson’s book Mom, They're Teasing Me: Helping Your Child Solve Social Problems. If you want to hear "A Little Happier" episode where I talk about one of the most important lessons I gleaned from that book, it’s here.

    6. The Blessing of a Skinned Knee by Wendy Mogel.

    This is a very useful book that emphasizes why it’s important to let children make mistakes, suffer consequences, handle disappointment, and deal with boredom as part of their growing up.

    What are your favorite books about parenthood? I’d be especially interested in any recommendations aimed at parents of twenty-something children. My older daughter isn’t twenty yet, but she will be, before I know it. The days are long, but the years are short.

     
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